How To Be a Woman

How To Be A Woman
May 13, 2008 by Candice Schutter
(response to
How to Be A Man by Steve Pavlina)

The Yin Warrior is an ancient archetype, and a woman of a new and enlightened world. She is the wayshower for the many who yearn for the Feminine to re-emerge as compassionate, empathic leadership.

The Order of Life for the Yin Warrior is:
Instinct: elemental connection with her environment (her physical body being the most important environment to fully embody)
Intuition: the way that life speaks to and through her through Instinct (felt sensation) as a foundation
Interdependence: how her instincts and intuitions enable her to effectively interact with others in relationships

For too long the Yin Warrior has been asleep in our culture. The Order of Life for women has been operating backwards. Relationships are often put before all else - overriding both the impulses of Instinct and Intuition. Intuition has been overshadowed by measurable truths or mistaken for mystical fantasy. And Instinct - spoken through the physical body world - has become a vehicle in which to meet desired ends, rather than a sacred space to embody as the foundation of life.

Let's re-visit The Order of Life for the Yin Warrior through some of her many tools:

A woman has a visceral knowing - being one with the earth. She understands the elemental dust from which she - and all things - arise from and return to. She embraces the body in its curvaceous celebration of the cyclical nature of form. The body is her temple and instinct is the voice of the Earth itself echoing through its walls. As the space through which life enters, she is masterful at understanding energetic landscapes and the weather patterns of the life unfolding all around her. Her body speaks volumes through sensation.

She becomes silent enough to attend to the winds within her body and its resulting rhythms. Harmony is found in nature and her connection to it. All of life around her is Nature speaking to her. She asks: Are you listening? How is the flow of the Body World supporting your desires in the moment? Is there resistance? In which direction can your steer the vessel of your life so that flow is found again? She makes choices that yield to a rhythm her body can move through with ease. She cultivates strength by befriending grace and sensation as allies. She is a master of patience in the birth of all things.

Perhaps most importantly in this time of women-against-women... she puts down her sword of judgement once and for all. The Yin Warrior wields no weapon. She shines with an Open Heart - as it is the only "protection" she needs. When anyone (including another woman!) speaks, the Yin Warrior listens with her entire body. She overrides the cultural tendency to self-compare (attire, physique, age, etc); competition is meaningless to her. Instead she hears what is being said beneath the surface of things, using her body as a fine-tuned instrument of presence and discernment so that she may re-create harmony.

She makes her personal well-being a first priority and a felt sensation. She asks: When something "goes wrong" in your environment, where do you go to address the disharmony? Do you frantically resist your environment outside, hoping to change your internal landscapes? What does it take to restore a sense of balance in your body and heart? The Yin Warrior cultivates self-love by taking overt actions that affirm how her life matters to her.

The Yin Warrior listens to her own rhythms and instincts first and foremost. She feels no need to criticize, gossip, or complain... for she understands all impulses rippling in and around her are mirrors through which to see herself more clearly. She looks closely in such moments, and discerns how she might care for herself and the world around her more efficiently. Through self-nurturing, she re-aligns herself with the voice of her instincts (and the environment responds with harmony in accordance with her self-love). Her god-given enchantment is nurtured on a soulular level, so any measures to adorn her physical form are meant to enhance her natural radiance.

A woman knows without knowing how. An inner-aligment with instinct is the foundation for intuition. Tuning in - sensing the world within and without - is the grid upon which the heart rests in its knowing.

Radiant Knowledge
The knowing of the heart is radial. It encompasses all - even the unseen - in its assessment of the moment. This is why instinct coupled with sensation is the foundation of such knowledge. Without this radial awareness, instinct becomes egocentric and blind to the whole. Fearful instincts are not considered in context, and are thus mistaken for intuitive knowing. Therefore, the Yin Warrior is firmly anchored in the body world so that she may be a conduit for knowledge of another kind.

When intuition comes, it need not be accompanied by fireworks. It creeps up in the heart of a woman, and she knows not its true source. A sudden awareness emerges - through thought, word, image, or sensation. The Yin Warrior holds this knowing up against her internal compass which measures its implications on the environment around her. Only when a confirmation responds from within does she give movement to her knowledge.

Emphatic Truth
Empathy is that which makes necessary the path of the woman as a warrior archetype in our existing culture. Empathy is the tool the Yin Warrior lives her life learning to understand. A woman who embraces her inherent gifts and is in touch with the world around her may sometimes feel bombarded with information and stimulation. Sensation is heightened and can overwhelm the body. Intuition is activated and can overwhelm the heart and mind. The Yin Warrior applies her empathic abilities to balance these tendencies, as she receives from so many sources at once. Once balanced, empathy says, I sense the energy that is present while knowing that I am she who is sensing. I do not confuse myself with the energetic environment in which I live... nor that which I interact with. I do not confuse your experience with the truth of who you are. I see behind the veils of this world; and therefore, I never lose my faith in love.

In this way, truth is welcome in a new way. The Yin Warrior speaks great truth with an ease, an acceptance, a grace. She shares what is alive inside of her without becoming lost in the experience. She comes from a place of harmony... so no matter the potency of the honesty she transmits, she is understood in her intention to create connection. She is direct and clear in her communication, but never confrontational. Connection is her starting point, and her endpoint. She is truly a conduit of love through word and action.

When instinct (physical radiance) and intuition (heart radiance) are attended to, a woman is at one with her world. It is then that relationship reveals itself Whole through her.

Partner with the Beloved He
The Yin Warrior knows that the union of Her Most Sacred Heart with the Beloved He comes first. She places her body, heart, and soul in union with the force of life... and it dances her with a graceful ease. Her life is meant to service and nurture Relationship the the All of Life, first and foremost. This is the Divine Marriage through which she will find her greatest joys and sorrows (both of which she honors and treasures for their unique gifts).

The Infinite Spaceholder
The Yin Warrior holds space through which life can happen. She is the fertile soil of the land. No matter how the fields of her heart are tended, she returns to wholeness again and again. Resilience as a concept can not do her justice. Nor the concept of the Survivor, for it implies victimhood. She is no victim, regardless of circumstance. She is the ultimate power of acceptance. Divine acceptance that sees through veils of personalities, challenges, and consequence. Her choices are sacred acts of love - each a birth of life worth celebrating to fruition. And, knowing nature, she knows this... ALL will bear fruit, in due time.

The Nurturer, she pulls all of life to her bosom in order to shed light of love.
Treat all as innocent children, she whispers.
Accept this world. Love it whole in order to change it.

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